Businesswoman hiding behind plant wearing disguise

Undercover Trumper

(My rant about living and working in Liberal Hollywood)

Yesterday, in the production office, I leaned over to a colleague and asked him if he thought that since even CNN was reporting that the Dow was super high, unemployment super low, and the housing market super red hot, that maybe it was time to acknowledge that Trump had actually done at least a few good things for the country so far. He carefully considered this and evenly responded, “You know, you are right. The Dow has never been this high.”

I smiled and he smiled and I thought we might hug. Awwwww.

Yeah, right. Like that would ever happen.

If I had the guts (and believe me, I don’t) to dare bring up the President’s name in a complimentary way without a vile sneer on my face, my colleague would not be able to respond civilly. No, their reaction would most likely be along the lines of collapsing on the carpet after too many sharp intake breaths, or violently convulsing and sputtering under a deluge of tears, while pointing aggressively in my direction. They might even just start punching me, careful to avoid ripping their black armband of mourning they’ve been sporting since Hilary lost—OK, only one person is still wearing theirs to the office. In any event, I’d be out of a job in about four seconds, so that’s not usually how I converse with my coworkers.

The day after the election even my insurance agent could barely carry on her job duties. She choked out the details of my quote, alternating between sobs and unhinged bravado. “We’ll separate. That’s what we’re doing! California is NOT going to be part of – there is no way – that scumbag…!” She couldn’t even say his name. For her, the end of the world had arrived. For me, I just needed insurance.

That woman had been whipped up into froth by the media and her friends, convinced that Dictator Trump would do the most horrific things without oversight. He would march in and throw the notion of three branches of government and the inherent checks and balances completely out of the Capital Building window. It would be genocide.

I wish I could have told her not to worry, but she barked, “Don’t tell me not to worry!” before I had a chance. So I listened to her breakdown, suitably sympathetic, I hope, and prayed I wouldn’t lose my house over an error she might make on the escrow.

Since that time my friends and family have been involved in many protests and marches. A few have advocated violence. It’s like they don’t believe in democracy unless they are winning. A somewhat hypocritical perspective since they tout themselves as tolerant progressives.

The Mainstream Media has clearly fueled the flames with a click agenda that has, at times, devolved into strategic omissions and lies. I used to be a huge fan but I no longer think CNN has any more credibility then the National Enquirer. They are telling those around me what to think and manipulating them to line their own pockets. The Media has become the ‘opiate of the masses’.

I’d like to engage in a lively discussion with people around me and bring up the fact that Trump has done a great job of addressing and stopping human trafficking, for instance. I’d like to share the relief I feel about Trump ending the TPP—foreign corporations would have had the right to block local legislation. I’m glad he encouraged Russia to take care of Syria, which has resulted in real gains against ISIS. I’d love to enjoy camaraderie with a friend as we marveled at the largest pharma fraud bust in US history, instigated by Jeff Sessions.

However, I would never shoot myself in the foot that way—not with hungry mouths to feed.

Thankfully, it’s not difficult hiding in plain sight. And there are more than a few of us masquerading. We can sometimes spot one another: Those that don’t guffaw at the crude Trump joke—those that tilt their heads quizzically and smile distantly at the latest Trump accusation. Perhaps we should have a secret handshake like the Freemasons.

I received a circular from the National Organization of Women magazine today, imploring that I donate to them because they are going to fight the evil Donald Trump. Making sure I feel like a victim so I can hire them to supposedly advocate for me, “That was NOT just locker room talk!” they remind me.

Ladies, seriously, who cares? You sound like a bunch of hysterical women and it’s embarrassing. You remind me of the prohibitionists from the 20s, hell bent on killing everyone’s fun. Having worked for a number of years with primarily men, I’ve heard worse, and it doesn’t bother me. I might have said worse. Good manners are not an indication of anything other than good manipulative skills. And no, I didn’t get less money than my male cohorts, btw. Don’t need your help defending my rights or ANYTHING.

President Trump certainly is less than well behaved on a regular basis but I don’t really care. Look, I wouldn’t hire a nice guy to be my divorce attorney; I’d rather have a vicious son-of-a-bitch. I’m happy to have a world-class businessman who is not in anyone’s pocket helping to make the country’s decisions. He wants to solve our problems and so far, he is doing a damn good job.

By freeing up regulation, bringing jobs back, allowing parents to choose the schools they want, enabling consumers to purchase the health plans they need, placing limits on immigration, enforcing our laws and standing up to bullies, our country will soar. And that’s good for everyone. I wish more people would put aside their hate and begin noticing the President’s accomplishments. His success is really our success as a nation.

I wish my friends/family would stop trusting the media and start asking questions like this: Are well-meaning policies really making a difference to the issues or is this ideology being used as a tool by the corrupt few to steer the public for their own benefit? Is racism the most important political issue of our time or is the Media trying to sow discontent? Is there really a gender gap or is this a subterfuge required to justify political saviors?

We currently have a President that isn’t afraid to call out the Media and those that are politically motivated. He can’t be manipulated as typical politicians are. He doesn’t even draw a salary—he donates it all to charity. This unique situation has created a great opportunity for accomplishing goals that are actually in America’s best interests instead of for the benefit of greedy politicians. It’s not generally being seen as such by most people I know. Friends are reluctant to waver from their stance of Republican = very bad person NO MATTER WHAT and if you think President Trump is not the most vile, disgusting, stupid, untalented, incapable, ill-meaning, racist, duplicitous, conniving, evil, ugly, stupid, stupid person ever, THEN YOU MUST BE ONE OF THEM.

It’s not just Liberals that stubbornly cling to their own narrative. Passionate people on both the Left and the Right reject the notion the other side has any merit. Sometimes they don’t recognize each other as even human. They fling a never ending supply of poo and vitriol at one another, dismissing good arguments on the other side as an attack on the value system that defines they themselves. If I recognize those people have a point, then horror, I must not be right about everything!

If we would really listen to one another long enough to understand the reasons opposing viewpoints exist, instead of name-calling and shoving placards with simplistic bumperstickereze in other people’s faces, we might move forward together. We could find common ground. It’s really important to your own argument to understand the opposite viewpoint. “He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that.”—John Stuart Mill.

Most people want the same things—there are different opinions on how best to get there. Liberals are often smart and creative people with ideas and Conservatives are often smart and pragmatic people who understand structure. We need each other to attain the best results. How compassionate or empathetic are solutions that sound good, but don’t really work or worse, prove harmful?

We need passion and logic, creativity and rationality, new ideas and sound construction to achieve our goals. We can craft better solutions if we listen to one another and work together to employ true diversity of thought.

We can’t even get to that point, though, if the discussion is TOO PAINFUL for people to engage in. I’d like to make these suggestions to my friends: Man up! Get some resiliency for Fuck’s sake! Stop blaming everyone else for your problems. I know you are a good person, and so am I, so for crissakes enough with the mask of oh-so virtuous compassion. Let’s really talk about things and if I don’t agree you have all the answers it doesn’t make me evil.

Yeah, I’d like to dip my toe in these issues at the water cooler or at Thanksgiving Dinner, and maybe someday I’ll be able to. Until then, I’m just an…

Undercover Trumper.


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